As you may have heard, Rosie O’Donnell, the former “queen of nice,” will return to daytime TV this fall when she once again co-hosts The View. In order to prepare you for the fallout this will cause, we’ve gathered 17 moments in which Rosie kind of overwhelmed us a little.
Rosie sings about pretending to think Tom Cruise is sexy
Back in the ‘90’s, Rosie really wanted people to think she was straight. Like really, really wanted people to think she was straight.
Maybe it was because she knew stay-at-home moms in Clinton’s America just weren’t ready for a lesbian daytime talk show host. Or maybe she didn’t want to damage her Nickelodeon-flavored, kid-friendly image. Either way, she needed a beard—ideally, one that was detachable and rarely in the same room.
In the ’90’s, who was a more appropriate idol for hetero women’s lust than Tom Cruise? David Duchovny, you say? Nah, he would be much too available (and willing). Rosie needed someone who was literally unreachable. Good old Jerry Maguire was her best option. Especially since he was married and all.
The Tom Cruise crush became one of Rosie O’Donnell’s signature gags. Sexually frustrated mothers everywhere could relate to her sugary faux-obsession. Rosie brought “Tommy” up daily, on every episode, with almost all of her guests. It even lead to this moment, where she decided to sing a number dedicated to her “raw passion” for him.
Because there’s nothing more straight than expressing love through showtunes, sparkly shirts, and Broadway dancers.